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April 28, 2008

The excluded elite.

There is an intensely frustrating aspect to running a contest. Nobody told me about this.

See, now that I'm reading entries on toy horrors, I'm inspired to write one - but I can't allow myself to! I've just realised that I'm one of a very select group, one of around ten people on the entire planet who aren't allowed to enter this competition. So I have to keep quiet.

What if someone sends in a story based on the same idea? What if I mention my ideas here and someone thinks 'Damn, I was going to do that'? I have to keep my mouth closed, and have installed a handy zip for the purpose. (Before anyone says 'Damn, I was going to do that', it's already been done by Clive Barker in 'Cabal', later made into the movie 'Nightbreed'. Button-head had a zipper mouth. So I haven't cheated you, and if you can use a zipper-mouth doll, go ahead anyway).

So I have turned to other things for now. For instance, a new psycho killer in space story called 'Claiming Number Eight', some more tales of the Blackthorn family, a revamp of a few oldies for Anthology Builder,  and of course the search continues for an agent for the novel side of things. I'm keeping busy but thoughts still stray back to...no, must close the zip.

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April 16, 2008

Nepotism

I admit I was disappointed to find this has nothing to do with necromancy. Ah well.

It's something politicians do: give unfair favourable treatment to family and friends. Something that I might be accused of should any of those writers who know me (but who never visit, strangely enough) enter the current Alienskin competition.

So, if you are a Virtual Friend of Dume, I ask that you use another name for your entry. If it should win, you can let us know when you're told of this and we can put your real name on the story. For judging purposes though, if you know me, hide the fact. Shouldn't be too hard. Most who know me are loathe to admit it anyway.

For everyone - keep them coming and be sure to read the guidelines first. You can only enter once, so if you screw up, all you can look forward to is the hoot of derision echoing across the swamp from Dume Towers. There are a few good ones here already but keep sending - it's good practice even if you don't win.

Remember, you've nothing to lose. There's no entry fee and those that don't win aren't published, so you can still sell the first rights.

I keep your soul though.

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April 03, 2008

A Dume and his money...

...are seldom parted. Yet there is to be an exception to this immutable rule, after all these years. My ancestors' skulls have all turned their faces to the wall in disgust.

Alienskin are running a competition. I will judge this, with my usual tender care. Fear not, I have warmed up the tenderiser. Take a look and enter if you dare. The prize is high. Cash, free clothing and publication, all in one. Winner takes all.

I'm only going to mention one rule here. Read the damn guidelines. If you don't follow the guidelines, not only are you certain not to win but I will personally sneer at you. I'll print the story just so I can tear it up and burn it. You have been warned.

In the new issue (out now - I forgot to mention that!) there are more Hall of Shame failures. It's bad enough being in there but responding to rejection with 'You can't reject me. I'm better than you' is just stupid. Yet there's one in that list who did. You know who you are. You are not barred from entering this competition but be aware that you've already biased me against you. So it had better be good, and it had better fit the guidelines with millimetre precision.

The rules don't say 'no poetry' but take it from me, poetry won't win. Alienskin's overall guidelines apply and one of those is...no poetry. Unless you can write an entire horror story in the style of Dr. Seuss. I'd really like to see that. Don't take that as a challenge unless you can do it really, really well.

I've scanned this issue's stories in case there were any toy stories already up. I saw none, but I haven't yet read all the stories so I might be wrong. If there are, well, you can't re-use them. No second-hand stories.

Read the guidelines, and read the article for hints. Then write. Then rewrite. Check and double-check spelling and grammar. Then send, and cross any crossable bits you might be blessed with.

Good luck, and remember - a Dume doesn't part with money easily. It needs to scare me more than the thought of parting with money.

Now that's scary.

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March 25, 2008

The New-Fangled Way.

The trouble with anthologies, as a reader, is that they usually contain roughly 50% of stories I like and 50% of stories I'm not interested in.

As a writer, the troubles with anthologies are manifold. One, they're difficult to get into. There's only so much space and most of it is already occupied by invited authors. Slots are few. Competition is fierce.

Two, do you promote it? You're only one author within the collection. Any promotion you do benefits the others, but how do you know if they're reciprocating?

Three, they're usually one-off small payments because it's a pain for the editor to keep divvying up royalty cheques into small amounts. So you're paid, that's that, there's no reason to push the book. Chalk up one publishing credit and move on.

The electronic age contains a solution to all these problems. A pick-and-mix anthology. Choose your stories, order the book and wait for the postman. One bound book with the short story collection you chose. Huge thanks are due to David de Beer for telling me about this. So, as payback, I'll mention he has a story coming up in the June/July Alienskin magazine.

For the reader, this is great. You choose every story so there are no duds in there.

For the writer, it's even better. Instead of fighting for space in a single anthology, your story sits in a list. Readers can choose to include it. Okay, maybe nobody ever will but it costs nothing to leave it there. You have an incentive to promote the story (which is what I'm doing right now in case you hadn't guessed) because you're only promoting your own work. The more anthologies it gets included in, the better your name gets known.

Since it's a royalty-payment system, your earnings also depend on inclusion in anthologies. Don't expect to get rich by this route. The money is small but the kudos is large. Your story--indeed, stories--could be in many anthologies chosen by many people. Getting your name recognised is a Good Thing if you want to stand a chance in the bigger pond, where the novels fight it out on shelves.

I've saved the best bit until last. The stories don't have to be first publications. In fact, Anthology Builder prefers stories that have been previously published in a paying market. This is a place for stories that have been published, after the first rights have expired and the story is yours again. Note - be sure the rights have reverted to you first or you'll be in trouble.

Good news for paying markets, too. The story is listed on the site along with the market it was published in and the year of publication. Publicity is always good.

So how do you get your stories in? First, read the guidelines. Then read them again because I know you only skimmed them first time. Make sure your format is right and your story fits in one of the categories they're looking for. There are lots of categories. Second, sign up. The price tag attached to this is my favourite one. Free. Finally, submit and wait for a decision. That's all there is to it.

Oh, and while you're there, buy yourself an anthology. Be sure to include 'The Hand that Feeds', which first appeared in AlienSkin in 2003. It's there under my pen name, Kevin Hillman.

I intend to submit more. Eventually, enough to fill an anthology on my own.

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September 22, 2007

Out of the swamp.

Today I actually left Dume Swamp for the first time ever.

The occasion was indeed a great one, as it must be for me to leave these comfortable environs. I was so overcome with euphoria I even managed to ride the weekly bus without throwing up.

Someone invited me somewhere!

To be precise, I visited a place of fantasy, a place where cruel people live. It was a delight to discover that there are such places. It gives me hope for the world.

The place I visited is here: http://toasted-scimitar.blogspot.com/

I left a few words to prove I was there, and dashed off home before I had to actually meet anyone. It was wonderful to be invited away, but it's good to be home.

Although Stumpy has made something of a mess while I was away. Next time I'll lock him in a dungeon for the duration.

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June 08, 2007

New Alienskin available.

The new Alienskin mag is online, and I have a little article within its pages on the merriment that can be drawn from tales of terror. Many, many excellent stories as always, but none by me.

All my short stories turn into novels these days. Where is the Dume brevity, the bone-snap of flash fiction, the quick neck-twist of the short story?

I have inspiration, and I've stopped taking the tablets for it so all is not lost. On YouTube I found the old Beatles song 'I am the Walrus', and its unusual lyrics made sense to me. In a short story sort of way.

'The Walrus' is gestating. I'm going to let it simmer overnight and see what floats to the surface.

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April 04, 2007

The horror, the horror.

The new issue of AlienSkin magazine is now available and free to read.

You don't want to miss this one. The fantasy article is about death, the science fiction article is about horror, and my own contribution has a smattering (should that be a spattering?) of gore also.

Best hurry on over there. You only have two months to read it all.

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